Tuesday, September 29, 2015

desert mood

watercolor and ink on
300 g/140 lbs watercolor paper, 6 x 9"/~ 15 x 23 cm

swimmer and saffron
watercolor on 300 g/140 lbs watercolor paper (Fabriano Artistico, rough grain), 7,5 x 11" / 17,8 x 28 cm

And once more I chose to torture myself. I cannot count how often I watched "The English Patient" in the last 19 years. Which is dangerous for someone who is melancholic on good days. But since I'm also a hopeless romantic, I need to watch a film like this from time to time. I just need to be extremely careful in handling myself afterwards. This might sound funny to someone who doesn't know depression (and let me say I'm *happy* for everyone who doesn't know), but I need to catch myself quickly, should I notice the all too familiar downward spiral. Still, I need the torture from time to time, this film, to me, is worth the danger. Almásy talking to Katharine about different winds during the sandstorm in the car, touching her hair for the first time is all it needs to bring me to my knees. Especially knowing so well what is to come.